Screw The Filters And Curation. Let’s Get Raw.

Screw The Filters And Curation. Let’s Get Raw. | freshbysian.com

There’s been a lot of talk lately about the world of social media and how we use it to portray our lives in a certain way.

We filter.
We curate.
We show our lives in a way that might not illustrate the whole story... And this is totally okay. There's no judgement on this at all... It is how it is. 

The world of social media is a bloody massive topic, and a pretty interesting one. I don’t want to dive into my thoughts about it today, but this recently sparked conversation inspired to share a bunch of stuff with you that I haven't really talked about before.

You might have seen posts similar to this before too. A few years ago Jess Lively did one called ‘Things I’m Afraid To Tell You’, and it kinda took over the internet for a little bit, as other people started sharing their own fears and stories and secrets.

It's not about having a whinge or complaining, it's about simply saying 'Hey, this is how it is'.

So… here’s some stuff I’m kind of afraid to tell you. I want to write this post because I think there’s power in sharing the real life/behind the scenes shit.

We’re all human.
We’re not perfect.
And we gotta commit to getting raw more often.


:: I launched something that kinda failed.

I launched my toolkit, Play Bigger, around June/July. I thought it was something people would be into. I wanted it to help people from getting screwed over by dodgy creatives, or wasting time and money.

On launch day I sold about 3. All up I think I've had less than 20 sales.

I'm stoked for those sales and I hope they've helped those people, but the sales were a lot less than I was aiming for. 

Why didn't it sell? I’m not sure. Maybe the pricing was off. Maybe people just weren’t that interested in it. Maybe I promoted it wrong. 

Whatever the reason, I still have it up in my shop but I’m not putting too much energy into it these days as there’s other stuff I want to create and experiment with more.

 

:: I keep letting money stop me from doing things I want to do, and I’m fucking over it. 

In all honesty — I’m still figuring this out. I have a lot of limiting beliefs and money blocks, and I’m over it. I’m doing my best to change my mindset — by having convos with people who have a better handle on it, and by reading books like Lucky Bitch — but it’s tough. 

 

:: It’s taken me about 12 months to grow the balls to really make a big change in my business.

I started getting a feel about a year ago that client work wasn’t my vibe anymore, and that I needed to change it up. I still wanted to work with a very selective handful of awesome clients on an on-going basis, and I didn't know exactly what to do about that vibe, so I just kept taking on client work.

As it turned out, a few of the projects I took on after I started getting that vibe fell through for various reasons. It was only when that started happening that I realised I needed to make a change towards doing more of the work that got me really stoked. (i.e. Building my own digital products).

I think a big part of this was letting go of what I thought I wanted. I used to absolutely LOVE working with clients and designing brands + websites for people. But these days it just doesn’t get me stoked anymore… And it took a while for me to actually face that and make a change.

 

:: I miss Canada. A lot. 

I spent a year in Vancouver + Whistler in September 2013, and I found the place where I’m meant to be. I'm so grateful for the time I had there, but I can barely even look at photos or videos of Canada because it hurts so much that I'm not there. I know we're meant to be all about being in the present, but sometimes it's so much easier said than done.  

I’m in the process of applying for residency, and the process is rough.

It’s long. And it’s taking even longer because I don’t have a job offer, and I don’t intend to get one — as I want to stay self-employed (the whole process is points based, so you get more points if you have a job offer/sponsorship, which increases your chances of getting chosen). 

But one thing that keeps me going is knowing that I’m still allowed to visit as a tourist in the mean time. I want to get back there next year, but first I have to stop mind-fucking myself with the whole money thing (see #2).

 

:: I had to learn the hard way about putting people on pedestals. 

You know what they say about putting someone above you… Don’t be surprised when they start looking down on you. This happened to me a few years ago with someone I met that was totally different to anyone I'd ever known. I idolised the shit out of them... So you can probably guess how the story goes.

It took me a loooong time to get over it.

No one is above you, or below you. We’re all equal. We're all on the same level. Lesson learned.

This also lead me to learn a lot more about self-love, mostly thanks to the one-and-only Gala Darling.

 

:: Living a truly authentic life is hard.

Authenticity is something I value pretty highly. It's something everyone is always talking about online these days, but I feel it's so much harder to achieve than we actually acknowledge. Why?

Because there's new apps and opportunities and technology and products and services and shit being thrown at us 24/7, and we have to ruthlessly say no, a lot. 

The temptation to jump on bandwagons because you want to hang out with the cool kids is very real.

Sometimes I feel a lot of pressure to do webinars or be on Periscope or start a podcast, or do whatever everyone else is up to. And hey — maybe I will try this stuff in the future, but right now I know that if I did, it would be for the wrong reasons. 

We have to know what we want and what we value, and we have to keep our own mission at the forefront of every decision we make. 

 

:: I'm not friends with anyone I went to school with.

This is a weird one. The more I talk to other people about this, the more I start to feel like I'm not the only one.

I never really liked intermediate or high school that much... I always did okay and got decent grades (apart from PE, which I fucking hated), and it was fun while it lasted, but I always felt like I hadn't found my true 'people' yet.

So I chose to leave GTFO and leave high school a year early, to go meet new people and study something I was actually passionate about.


So, that’s me. If you feel inspired to get raw and share something that scares you, comment below or write your own post, and come back + let me know in the comments where I can see it.

WE’RE ALL IN THIS TOGETHER.

I hope to do more of these posts in the future — as well as weaving these stories/lessons/failures/fuck ups throughout everything I post.